Stop Listening To Everyone

 In Entrepreneur, Mindset, Overwhelm, Self sabotage, Uncategorized

Stop listening to everyone, because you’re hearing no one.


The online business space is LOUD and the noise can be deafening at times, especially if you’re listening to multiple people, multiple voices and multiple, often conflicting advice and points of view.


Listening to and following everyone causes you to have too many things and too many voices swimming about in your noggin which leads to all the gremlins rearing their ugly heads.  


Cue overwhelm, self doubt, procrastination and all their friends.  


Which is not the best mindset to be when you’re running a business and trying to get stuff done.


Everywhere you look there will be someone telling you that their specialism, platform or strategy is THE one thing you need to get you where you want to be, that without it you ‘don’t have a business.’


It’s exhausting.


I remember when I first started my business I was absorbing all the things.  I was trying to be on all the platforms, listen to all the free advice, investing in all the programmes and…doing not a whole lot of anything to be honest.


I was confused and felt pulled in all directions with no one clear focus.  


Thankfully I recognised it fairly quickly.  


I recognised that to get to where I wanted to go I needed to cut out the noise and find ‘my’ people.  


There are a lot of ‘guru’s’ in this industry who don’t always have the best of intentions and will use all those sleazy tactics that you’re avoiding doing because it gives you the ick.  


It’s time for an audit!  


I regularly check in with who is taking up space in my feed, groups, my inbox and serving me ads to make sure the noise levels are right for me, and it’s from the right people.


It’s not going to happen overnight but when you really start to analyse if who you’re following are a good, positive influence on you and your mindset…or a negative one then things will become much clearer, more focused and more strategic, and you’re more likely to actually take action with a few less gremlins in the way.


Pick your own platforms.


Where are YOUR ideal clients?  


I know everyone and his wife are saying Linkedin is the new buzz platform for 2019 for example…but if that’s not where YOUR ideal client is and you’re not looking for corporate gigs, then is it the right platform for you?  Probably not!


So there’s some noise you can cut out.  


It doesn’t mean you’re saying you’re NEVER going to use it, it’s just not right for you right now.  


Also where do YOU like being?  


What is YOUR favourite platform to be on?  If you like using it guess what? You’re more likely to use it!  


If you’re trying to do things and be in places because other people say you ‘should’ but really you don’t want to…guess what’s going to happen?


Pushing water uphill time and your friend procrastination is going to get in your way big time!  


Choose people based on your values.  


What do you value in a person or in a business?  


For me it’s honesty, authenticity and integrity, what you see is what you get, which for me creates trust.  


That’s not going to be the same for everyone, but that’s what I look for in a person to follow.  


The second I get a feeling in my gut that someone doesn’t fit that bracket they’re on my unfollow list.


I was at a big business seminar for 2 days last week and it was honestly, so refreshing.  


The majority of speakers sold high ticket items from the stage but they were so HONEST about it!


They didn’t try to dupe, guilt or bully anyone into buying, they didn’t try to pull the wool over anyone’s eyes, they made fun of a lot of the sleazy tactics and they didn’t give you the ‘what but not the how’ and just said ‘hey, if you’ve got this problem I can solve it, here’s how, up to you, come have a chat if you’ve got any questions’.  


But there was a friend I bumped into there who really didn’t like how ‘salesy’ it was, which is exactly what I mean by going for what you value, for me their honesty made it feel a lot less salesy.


I was just grateful for the honesty.  


I took value from every single person speaking whether I bought from them or not.


My favourite part of it was that every speaker interacted with all the delegates, genuinely!  Not because they HAD to (which personally I always think is fairly obvious)


They wanted to meet and speak to people and acted ‘on a level’ with everyone.


What and who you saw on stage was what and who you got in person, reminding us that our heroes are human too, right!  


They’re not magical unicorns, if it’s achievable for them it’s achievable for you too!


They have gone through what we’ve gone through at one point and they empathise with and respect the journey.


I was sold to, for two whole days and left feeling great about it! I’ve been to MANY events where that hasn’t been the case.


So, look through your fb groups, your insta feed, your fb friends, your inbox and get unfollowing until you have a space that’s filled with people who inspire and motivate you and makes you feel GOOD, not overwhelmed!


Next Up…Friends and family


Then there is the noise of friends and family members.


Some mean well, some not so much but really they’re usually just projecting their own fears and beliefs onto you.


Or it could be that they’re actually jealous or you could be highlighting a trait in yourself that they wish they had.  


A lot of people would love to be able to back themselves to start their own business but they just don’t.


This is something I see come up time and time again from clients and friends running their businesses and it’s even something that made me quit on my first business when a comment of, ‘Fran, you really should just get a proper job’ was uttered…and I listened!


Often their comments are unhelpful.  (Here’s a few ways to handle it!)


Negative self chatter


Then there’s your own negative self talk.  


This is often the loudest of all.  


BUT, this is something you have control over, even if it doesn’t feel that way most of the time but you can absolutely change the way you talk to yourself.

 

You can increase your emotional intelligence and understand where certain thoughts may be coming from, you can create new neural pathways and literally change the way you think.  


I give you a TONNE of ways you can start doing that today in previous posts  The first key to changing it is awareness.  It’s not a conversation you’re having with yourself, it’s a habit you’ve created and habits can be changed.

 

But when you’re running a business you don’t have time for negative self talk and it WILL make you sabotage your own success so it’s important you get it in check.


Time to choose who you’re listening to…because when you’re listening to everyone, you really are hearing no one!


If you know that now is the time to start changing things for yourself and want to explore this further, have any questions or want some accountability to make sure you’re doing the things you need to then please book in a free discovery call so we can see what needs to happen to get you from where you’re at right now, to the successful business owner you know you can be!!

Fx

P.S – Last question…Are you sick of self sabotaging and procrastinating on getting your business going?  Would you like to learn some practical strategies to stop you procrastinating WHEN it happens so you can FINALLY get the things you NEED to do DONE?  Download my FREE guide below and I’ll show you 5 simple strategies to stop procrastination in its tracks!


Apply for The Proactive Pants Mastermind here

Join my AMAZING & FREE private facebook community here

Check out The Positive Pants Podcast hereFran Excell, mindset coach for self sabotaging female entrepreneurs at www.franexcell.com

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