Let Go Of Certainty
Let Go Of Certainty
Certainty is something that I see so many entrepreneurs craving.
So many people who are trying to go after their dreams and change their lives for the better want that thing that says ‘this is absolutely 100% going to work out just as you plan, go for it!.’
But the reality is it doesn’t quite work like that.
Certainty also doesn’t work like that in any other area of your life.
No such thing?
There really isn’t any such thing as certainty in this game but a form of certainty DOES lie in the things that we tell ourselves and the things that we believe, whether it is ACTUALLY there or not.
For example, certainty is not often questioned in a job, the accepted belief is that you’ll stay until you don’t want to stay anymore, it FEELS certain to our brains but it’s not really the true reality.
In jobs people get let go, made redundant, roles change, companies go under, bonuses reduce, terms change, all sorts can happen. We just have the perception that it’s ‘safer’ so it FEELS more certain which allows us to relax into it a bit more.
We’re searching for something that just doesn’t really come with the territory of being an entrepreneur.
And that’s ok. We just need to reframe it to ourselves and get comfortable with it.
Waiting for absolute certainty is a sure fire way to delay progress and to self-sabotage. Trust me I know!
What would you rather?
But would you rather struggle and hustle always doing all the things that are making you ‘busy being busy’ and not actually getting anywhere rather than actually put yourself out there just in case it doesn’t quite go according to plan?
You can do that sure, but where do you think your business will be in a year?
Where do you think you’ll be in a year?
Stop hiding, stop letting fear and uncertainty get in your way it’s now or never because all that waiting for everything to be in perfect, not launching because you don’t have all the pieces in place just yet will just mean that the ‘tomorrow’ or ‘next week’ you’re waiting for just won’t come.
Our brains are wired for certainty
The trouble is our brains are wired for certainty, it craves it and needs it, but as an entrepreneur, it just can’t have it.
What do I mean by we’re wired for it?
You actively get rewarded by your brain for ‘facts’ and ‘information’, lovely little hits of dopamine aplenty. It’s also almost as if you get ‘punished’ for not having all the answers because it activates your threat response and it feels stressful and uneasy and genuinely, to your brain, as if there is a threat to your life. It’s also flipping exhausting trying to predict outcomes all the time so that’s not fun either.
It’s more stressful!
The funny thing is the uncertainty is actually MORE stressful than actually being certain of a negative outcome! For example, When we’re running late for a train and we’re not sure we’re going to make it vs KNOWING we’ve already missed the train. Which is more stressful?
Change the way you perceive uncertainty
So we have to change the way our brain perceives it. Our brains will actively make it more difficult for us to go down the entrepreneurial path as it tries to actively avoid this uncertainty. Everything is rooted in the fear centre of our brain and this sends all the alarm bells ringing, stress hormones, cortisol and adrenaline aplenty. Our amygdala tries to keep us ‘safe’ protecting us from all these things that just aren’t a threat in this day and age.
BUT…there is a little beauty in this backwards way of protecting us. We actually GROW and LEARN more during times of uncertainty. This is one of the reasons pushing yourself out of your comfort zone is SO beneficial.
We grow as people and learn about what we can and can’t predict and learn to be more ok with the lack of predictability. So essentially the more we do it the BETTER at it we become.
Trust is something you can believe in. When you trust that the outcome will be beneficial in some way no matter what, then again you can learn to be more comfortable with uncertainty.
This is why SO many entrepreneurs have a strong spiritual side because faith and trust are hugely important in constantly putting yourself out of your comfort zone.
So whatever that means to you, whether that’s utmost faith in yourself, the law of attraction or some other kind of higher power, whatever it is it really doesn’t matter because the outcome is the same.
Personally, I’ve always had the belief that everything happens for a reason. So much so it’s tattooed on me!
I believe that whatever happens something good will always eventually come from it. I believe we can choose to look for the positive and see all the benefits and all the ways that negative thing changed has our lives for the positive and all the things that wouldn’t be in our lives now had it not happened. I’ve lived it a hundred times so I know it to be true…for me!
That’s my truth, my trust and my certainty. It doesn’t have to be yours but work out what yours is because when you have that everything becomes easier.
We don’t do this purely because we want to
A lot of us entrepreneurs didn’t become so because we just wanted to, more because we felt we needed to.
Like we were meant for more.
We all know we have certain gifts and talents to give to the world and problems we can solve. It would be selfish to keep to ourselves right?
Perhaps we also felt constrained by the traditional idea of a corporate career.
So many of us crave freedom but we tie ourselves up in knots and create something that feels like the polar opposite sometimes.
Becoming an entrepreneur is the biggest lesson in self development you’ll ever have. Belief systems and stories you had no idea were there come straight to the surface while you try to figure out what it is that’s holding you back.
But you get caught up in the practical, the facts, the certainty.
There are certain ways that you CAN get certainty to a certain extent. 😉
You can validate your idea. Do your research.
Get curious. Treat it all like one big experiment, what certainty are you looking for?
Turn ‘uncertainty’ into trust.
Don’t fear the bumps and bruises along the way, they’re good for you! They build resilience, they create growth!
Certainty will keep you waiting. You can’t predict the future as much as you’d like to.
Focus on what IS certain. Your values.
Accept what is and isn’t within your control, and on the stuff that isn’t, tune into that trust.
Stop looking at uncertainty as an inevitable negative.
Thinking about all the negative ‘what ifs’. What if it all goes exactly how you want it, what if it’s even better than you could ever have imagined?!
Always reconnect back to why you’re doing this. Not the surface why the BIG why. The why UNDER the why you tell other people ha! This wil drive you and keep you going when things feel tough.
If you can let go, let go of all the what ifs, reframe how you think about the worst case scenario and imagine the best instead…because you get to choose to do that… then that’s when it will become more fun and feel more certain.
If you know that now is the time to start changing things for yourself and want to explore this further, have any questions or want some accountability to make sure you’re doing the things you need to then please book in a free discovery call so we can see what needs to happen to get you from where you’re at right now, to the successful business owner you know you can be!!
P.S – Last question…Are you sick of self sabotaging and procrastinating on getting your business going? Would you like to learn some practical strategies to stop you procrastinating WHEN it happens so you can FINALLY get the things you NEED to do DONE? Download my FREE guide below and I’ll show you 5 simple strategies to stop procrastination in its tracks!
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Fran Excell, mindset coach for self sabotaging female entrepreneurs at www.franexcell.com
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