How to find out your values
Why are values important?
Value work is SO important in coaching and it’s SO important for us to know our values just going about our daily lives..
When you know what your values are it can help you make decisions that are in line with them.
When you’re feeling ‘off’ or ‘meh’, when you know your values you’re able to make sense of why and adjust accordingly.
Your values drive your actions and choices and have an effect over how satisfied you are with your lot in life!
For example, if ‘Freedom’ is one of your top values and your job is ‘middle’ management with a top heavy micro-managing structure that dictates the time you’re at your desk every day, your salary is ‘average’ which means you aren’t able to afford to do all the things you want to do and also means any ‘spontaneity’ is taken away due to needing to get time off ‘signed off’ then it can very quickly become clear that there is a conflict and you can see why you may be unhappy!
Values can impact so many areas of your life
It has a huge affect on your relationship with others, friends, lovers, anyone in your life and is often one of the reasons we ‘out grow’ our long-term friends.
It could be that when we were young we held similar values but throughout life those values have fundamentally changed, leading to a conflict.
It’s important to note that you can do this exercise today…and then again in 5 years and your values could be totally different. This is a fluid thing and important to revisit throughout your life.
How to work out YOUR values
I’m going to show you a simple way you can work out what yours are! Whoop!
Bear in mind this will be fairly surface level, it can often take several coaching sessions to really challenge these and get to the crux of what your values REALLY are but this will definitely give you a great starting point for exploration…and potentially unearth a few ‘a-ha’ moments!
Now, it’s very important to be really honest with yourself here and be clear that it is YOUR value, and not one you’ve been told you SHOULD have by parents or other people in your life, or you believe you SHOULD want based on what society dictates.
This is all about YOU and what YOU believe…otherwise there’s no point in doing it! 😉
So, first step…take a look at the list below (which is by no means exhaustive!) and circle ALL the ones you value.
Next…whittle this down to your 5 most important! If there are 2 that you see as the same thing then link them together. For example, Independence and Freedom or Authenticity and Honesty.
Then, take those 5 and put them in your HONEST order of importance, the top 3 are your top 3 values!
Humour Participation Community
Honesty Performance Service
Partnership Collaboration Productivity
Personal Power Contribution Freedom of choice
Excellence Connectedness Fun
Acknowledgment Focus Comradeship
Romance Lightness Recognition
Spirituality Harmony Empowerment
Accomplishment Self-Expression Orderliness
Integrity Creativity Independence
Nurturing Accuracy Joy
Adventure Beauty Authenticity
Zest Risk Taking Tradition
Peace Respect Elegance
Growth Vitality Aesthetics
Trust Fame Success
Love Fairness Being active
Novelty Safety Security
Excitement Change Curiosity
Learning Personal growth Kindness
So now when you’ve got a big decision to make, you can ask yourself if it’s in line with your values, if you’re feeling ‘off’ about a situation you can ask yourself if there’s a conflict with your values!
If you want to explore further or have any questions come join me in my private community below…we’re a supportive bunch and love to help!
P.S – If you’re struggling to see the positives at the moment download my FREE ‘Attitude of Gratitude’ daily journal below. It’s based in positive psychology and can help you get back to ‘you’ and help you get from feeling ‘Meh’ to ‘whoohoo’! Just print it out, put it by your bed and spend 5 minutes every evening writing it and see how things start to shift.
Mindset coach and mentor at www.franexcell.com
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